Interview and communication coach Siew Ling Hwang believes balancing work and family is not about keeping things even on both sides but about finding fulfilment with empathy, adaptability, and gratitude.
The mother of two daughters aged 18 and 12, has built a coaching practice that works with a wide range of clients from executives to students preparing for interviews and oral exams. She is sure her children have honed her coaching skills and considers them her “ultimate training ground” for her work. “Family members, and children in particular, are often the most difficult clients,” she says. “They have taught me how to listen and adjust my style.”
Lessons from motherhood
Siew Ling’s motherhood journey has also influenced each stage of her career, guiding her from investment banking and entrepreneurship to her current vocation of coaching. Her children have shaped each move, which she later reflected on, recognizing opportunities for change that gave her the courage and perspective to grow.
Silence as a powerful coaching tool is one of the techniques she applies at work and home. She calls it the “hmm” strategy, an intentional pause, which gives her the chance to listen and let a person finish what they are saying before replying. “Silence is an often underestimated but powerful tool,” she says. “When you create space, people are likely to come up with the solution themselves.”
Rethinking the balance
To her, the concept of work-life balance is a misnomer. Life, she says, rarely gives equal time or energy to work or family. Alignment with one’s values and a focus on hard work, gratitude, and flexibility towards fulfilment are what she cherishes.
Parenting, as she sees it, is the same. The values and the choices, she says, should be aligned. She wants to raise daughters she not only loves but also likes, young women who are kind, resilient, and independent. “Children see far more than they listen to,” she says. “If I want them to be empathetic, grateful, and hard-working, they need to see it in me.”
A message for parents and professionals
In her view, parenting can make you a better professional, and your career need not be at the cost of family life. The two roles are interlinked and complement each other for her. “Whether I am working with clients or having a conversation with my daughters, it comes down to the same principles: empathy, adaptability, and the courage to listen,” Siew Ling says.
You can find more about her work at www.discoveringpotential.com.sg and follow on Facebook @discoveringpotentialsg and on LinkedIn
